Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
How external is "for external use only"?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
