i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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