How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Too much gin, very little bucket
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
