if only i could text you this smell
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize