just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize