Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
