he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
