sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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