if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
