Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
