Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Define "chronic" masturbator.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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