Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
