We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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