And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
