scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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