Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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