I must be too annoying 4 u.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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