Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I think I am morally bankrupt
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
