I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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