at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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