I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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