you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
