margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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