he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Randomize
