Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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