You're completely useless in the revolution.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
