i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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