at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize