My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
