Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
