My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
