Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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