You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
