can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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