Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
it wasn't lemon gatorade
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize