gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
