I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I will be naked everywhere
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
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