I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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