the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
i believe in u and ur pee
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
