Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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