i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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