I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
