ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
