My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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