You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
