their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
