I never want to see another naked old woman again.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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