plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
