What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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