like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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