Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
